Monday, December 20, 2004

Big and I have the flu. Well, not today, but through the weekend. Considering that two Heartland employees and two of the nursing homes I frequent were spewing out virus-ladden snot everywhere, it was only a matter of time that my immune system fell prey to a rather nasty strain of the common cold, exacerbated by the fact that there are no goddamn flu shots anywhere in the cit-tay.

Effective Friday at 4AM, I was sick. My throat burned, and talking was out of the question. Actually, getting out of bed was pretty much out of the question. Luckly, Nurse FiFi stayed with me the majority of the day, always ready to administer an as needed dose of T.L.C. It was actually not bad, as the Tylenol Cold I consumed during the day allowed me to nap soundly as it fought the evil viral symptoms. Saturday wasn't much better, but at least the throat pain stopped. I was able to go out for a bit and buy more cold medicine to battle the head congestion, got some DVDs, and head back for a nap.

Big and I are never really sick, and when we are, we're big big whiny dorks about it. So when either one of us is sick, or even worse, if we are sick together, it's not a pretty picture. Sunday morning, I awoke feeling a lot better though still symptomatic. Unfortunately, Big woke up coughing and congested, but was less of a weenie than I was and actually trooped out despite recent onset of disease. We went out to breakfast as the Thera Flu started kicking in. Between our sweatiness, sniffling, and gorked out expressions, it's a wonder no one accused us of being junkees coming off the H. It's ironic because it's kind of how we felt. Neither one of us take medication regularly, so when we do expose our livers to such things as anti-histamines, it produces an effect double to that of the average medicated American. In short, it knocks me on my arse. We soon returned home, where poor Fee, tired of the plague of illness that invaded her little cozy abode, sought refuge in the closet for the remainder of the day. Big's coughing became severe at times, which kept him and I up a significant portion of the night. I'd also like to point out that both Big and I are card carrying members of the 8 or More Hours of Sleep A Night Club. I'm convinced that if Big could hibernate like a bear during winter, he'd gladly oblige (not that I can't blame him, because I'd probably do the same thing). Combine that with the fact that we both had to go out this morning and scrape ice and snow off our cars did leave either us cheerfully singing that it was off to work we go, hi-ho.

Luckly, we found an unlikely remedy in each of us going off to work, where Big said he found that when he got food in his stomach, took a dose of Dayquil, and had an activity in front of him that distracted him, he actually felt better. And to tell you the truth, I actually felt better as well being out and about, although the dry windy air wreaked havoc on my humidifier-spoiled lungs.
I raided the Cold N Cough section of Walgreens, got some more Thera Flu and, the mother load, a bottle of Robitussin CF. CF is absolutely the best stuff out there to decrease coughing. It burns like hell going down, but it works. I've also cranked up the humidifier and we're currently eating very spicy sandwiches from Wendy's to open up our nasal cavities, and so far we've managed to keep the foul virus at bay, and foul moods from running rampant. Thankfully, we'll be over this soon, and will feel up to devising a plan so that by the time we have children, we will be successfully able to coordinate our immune systems to never be sick together again.

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